Sean Rayshel’s Bahá'í Story

I was raised in a Baha’i family, my parents declared their belief in the Baha’i faith in 1971 and raised both my sister Erica and I as Baha’is, my mother’s parents were taught the faith by my parents and converted in 1973 making me technically a third-generation Baha’i.

In the early 80’s I was formally enrolled as a Baha’i child, and declared my belief in Bahá’u’lláh when I turned 15, the age of spiritual maturity in the Baha’i Faith.  There’s no pressure for children to become Baha’is and I gladly did this freely.

The town and Baha’i community I was raised in was Riverside, California.  Riverside‘s Baha’i community was lucky to have an actual Baha’i Center, which I considered my second home.   Most of my memories of the Riverside Baha’i community are wonderful.  It is a very diverse community which mirrored the Baha’i principle of “unity in diversity”. 

The adults of the Baha’i community treated me as an equal regardless of my age.   At an early age I was put on committees, assisted with the Baha’i bookstore, and would be a representative for the Baha’i community in various groups we belonged to and that was as a preteen!  

I was an early reader and read most Baha’i books and scripture that I could get my hands on.  It was in the mid-80’s that I discovered there was a Baha’i law against homosexuality, found in the Synopsis and Codification of the “Kitab-i-Aqdas”, as well  as the reference book “Lights of Guidance’’.  

I knew at an early age,  I was different, but did not know I was same sex attracted until I reached puberty, still it never sat well with me that homosexuality was prohibited.  My parents never spoke ill about gays and lesbians, and when I voiced my concern on the prohibition on homosexuality, they too shared my grievance, and felt it ran counter to the Baha’i principles of the unity of mankind; the elimination of prejudice of all kinds, and the embrace of science.  

In the mid-80’s,  I heard Baha’is make ignorant comments on homosexual men being infected with HIV/AIDS, some said it was a “punishment from God,“ and “they got what was coming to them “ all of which runs counter to Baha’i teachings.  It was these comments that emotionally scarred me, because they were not spiritual, caustic, and degrading.  

By the late 80’s, when our community had a longstanding Baha’i teaching booth at city events I witnessed gay and lesbian couples being told that the “Baha’i Faith wasn’t for them”, again this type of thinking runs counter to the Baha’i principle of “unity of mankind.“ 

It was at this time I discovered I was same sex attracted.  Years of depression and thoughts of suicide quickly followed.  I was very conflicted that the faith I loved, would not embrace me, ultimately as a gay youth.  

In 1992, the year of the Second Baha’i World Congress, the Baha’i book of Laws, the “Kitab-i-Aqdas”, (The Most Holy Book) was published in English in its entirety.   For the first time I could read Bahá’u’lláh’s actual words on the law against homosexuality, lo and behold,  it turns out he spoke against  the molestation of boys (pedophilia in general) , not adult same sex relationships. 

The only Guardian of the Baha’i Faith, Shoghi Effendi, was invested to interpret the word of Bahá’u’lláh, and somehow he came to the possible conclusion that Bahá’u’lláh was speaking about homosexuality, not pedophilia, a common misconception in the West during the middle of the 20th Century when pedophilia was conflated to homosexuality.  I was partially relieved to see that the law against homosexuality was not referring to myself in the least bit, but most Baha’is never questioned this interpretation and by doing so would be considered questioning the Baha’i Covenant .  

In the fall of 1996, I finally came out as gay.  I felt a huge burden was lifted from me, and that I had a new lease on life, my depression subsided and I started losing the weight I accrued over the years.  My family and most Baha’is excepted me being gay, however a handful of Baha’is reported my being openly gay to the secretary of the Riverside Baha’i community, she quickly shut them down for being gossips.

By the year 2000, I was elected to the Local Spiritual Assembly of Riverside, as openly gay.  In fact, I had a meeting with the Auxiliary Board Member for Protection and the Riverside Local Spiritual Assembly, prior to being elected assuring my safety being an openly gay man. It was with the same Auxiliary Board Member for Protection, who asked me to hold a deepening for her Assistants on homosexuality, where I addressed concerns of the LGBTQ community.   I left this deepening with high hopes for the future, it was not only positive it was the highlight of my being a Baha’i.  I was making strides in the larger area across many Baha’i communities by this deepening.  

The LGBTQ Baha’i Experience YouTube Channel

For decades, the global LGBTQ community has fought for inclusiveness when it comes to religion.  As some religions begin to open their arms, or at least are willing to discuss LGBTQ rights within their communities, the Baha’i Faith has hidden their discrimination against the LGBTQ Community, as they proclaim to be a progressive religion that embraces diversity and seeks the elimination of prejudices of all kind. 

Sean Rayshel and Rich Tarpening have set out to document the stories of LGBTQ Baha’i adherents, who have either left the faith or have been driven away due to sexual orientation.  Their aim is to showcase to the World that the message the Baha’i community is getting is not necessarily the one that is the truth. 

Production

Shooting for “No Matter How Fine a Love: The LGBTQ Baha'i Experience” has already begun, with principal photography taking place in California, Wilmette, Illinois, and at the Baha’i World Center in Haifa, Israel.